"it depends"

I've just had a great night hanging out with my friend Amy and amongst many many other topics of discussion, we were talking about friendships, degrees of friendships and also personality types/ personality tests and self awareness.

There are not many things that I can truly say I hate, but I honestly, really, HATE personality tests. I hate them. I can't really give a complete answer as to why that is, but I just don't like them. Perhaps I don't like getting to know myself because I don't like what I find? Or I find traits that I don't like. Which should serve as a motivator to change really.

I think that one of the main things that I dislike about these tests, is that my main answer or immediate response to pretty much every question asked is "it depends". I would describe myself as a chameleon. I think I can adapt to every situation and fit in, regardless of where I am and who I am with. I'm happy to be proven wrong with this, but that is what I believe I am like. I am quite as comfortable and happy living in the city as the country, being noisy as quiet, being instantaneous or patient... I can make some decisions spontaneously without a significant amount of thought like buying a ticket to England to move, while it may take me 3 months or more to decide whether I actually, truly like someone or not.

So, when I see a question in a personality test - my answer almost every time is "it depends"... on the situation, who i am with, my current state of self esteem (can vary greatly), where I am etc etc.

Anyway, I have been challenged to complete a particular personality test. I like challenges (I like to prove people wrong on the odd occasion..)! Amy swears by it. Once I get the address for it, I will complete it and let you know the results, my response and then whatever thoughts I have on its accuracy. Apparently it takes into account the "it depends" situations.. We shall see!!

With friendships, Amy asked me to explain my closest friends and something special about them. I came up with five main people. I have other friends too, but these 5 are the people who I probably have shared the most with, and let in the closest. I have alot of walls, and am very practiced at pushing people away. This isn't something that I'm particularly proud of, and I think I have improved in removing some of these walls and getting better at letting people really know me. I think I can get along with people very easily and will open myself to an extent, but letting them in properly - that will take a while!